It has been a challenging fall. My older two children have transitioned from homeschool to traditional school, and everything has been new, from having to get up early each morning to navigating homework to figuring out where to sit at lunch and who to play with at recess. They’ve been learning a lot; so am I. It’s taken months for us to get a sense of our new rhythms, and months for me to learn how to release them into the world. I’ve been breathing TRUST, my word for 2019. I’ve been journaling and praying and leaning on companions who remind me that it’s going to be ok, even when it doesn’t feel ok (really, why is lunchtime at school so hard?).
I thought this fall would be a creatively generative time, that my newly spacious calendar would connect to interior space and productivity. I had put both podcast recording and book marketing on hold for the summer, and I felt responsibility to return to both of those projects. But instead of experiencing interior spaciousness, I’ve encountered anxiety and grieving and identity shifts. What does it mean to be the parent of school-age children? Who am I now that my kids don’t need me in the same way? Who have I been and who do I want to be now? While it’s good to have space for those emotions and big questions, and while I don’t at all feel done with that inner work, I was starting to feel stuck in it. I was staring at it for a long time, without any movement, and I finally decided it was time to shift my gaze – at least a little bit, at least occasionally. I made a promise to myself a few weeks ago to make one small step forward on the podcast and the book each week. Whether I felt like it or not, I would begin some forward movement. I would honor my commitments.
Those small steps have opened up more grace and forward momentum than I could have hoped for. My first step was to contact potential interviewees for the podcast. Every person immediately replied yes, and within days I was recording again! I was surprised by how easy and natural it felt to record. As soon as I started listening to that first story, I was flooded again by my passion for this project. It is inspiring to hear individual’s story of connection with the divine. It is holy ground. The stories heighten my sense of what is possible in the spiritual life. I hope they’ll do the same for you.
For Season 2 of Life As Spiritual Practice, I’m moving slowly. The first season was a grand splash, eight episodes over eight weeks. This season I’m releasing every other week, for at least 10 episodes/20 weeks. I heard from listeners that it was hard to keep up because the content was so rich. I had a hard time keeping up too! Although conventional podcast wisdom says to release at least weekly, if not more frequently, to hold your audience’s attention, I can subvert the trend and listen to my own wisdom. This podcast is a slower, contemplative space, and I hope bi-weekly gives time for the episodes to unfold within your life.
The first episode will air next week. You’ll receive an email when it’s live.
I’m also slowly finding life and energy around promoting This Life That Is Ours. I was thrilled to hear from my publisher this summer that the book has been selling well. I’m beginning to think creatively about how to connect the book with more moms who long for a spiritual companion in their days. I’m working on supplementary material that will open new avenues of engagement, and researching speaking and retreat opportunities. I hope to have more to share next month.
Thank you for journeying with me. I hope this update meets you where you are, in the chaos and beauty of your everyday life. I hope the material coming your way over the next few months will provide sustenance for your spiritual journey. It’s a privilege to share the road with you.